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Do you ever feel like the new you is getting in the way of yourself? Do you ever feel like your past is blocking yourself and those around you from seeing who you have become and been made out to be?

 

As a flower blooms, it changes its shape. It doesn’t care that it started as a small bud. It cares about opening up to the light, exposing itself, and then becoming new. However, most who remember the once budding tree only see the flowers as an odd change or an enlargement of something.

Perhaps this only makes sense to me. Maybe my growth in the past 6 years since high school has only been apparent to myself. It’s not that I was such a terrible person that I needed to force myself to change or else I would die. It’s the fact of the matter of change. Everyone things that their point of view is supreme. What they think YOU should or shouldn’t change is the only thing that matters.

 

What if I want to change for myself?

What if I didn’t give a shit about what you think I should become?

I’m never “Christian” enough. I’m never skinny or fat enough. I am never funny enough or serious enough. I am not fashionable enough. I am never going to measure up.

 

I can say that I have changed. If you can’t see it, rip off one of my pedals and start with, “She loves me not.”

 

Because, well, if you don’t see my change as good, I cannot love you; She loves you not.

She loves you not.

She loves you not.

So go ahead. Run your mouth. Say my change is for the worse. Say whatever you would like. But, I see myself. I see the change every day. I see who I am becoming and where I am going. I see my mind shift. I see my confidence shift. I see my heart shift.

I see myself blossoming.

Measure me. Beat me down. But, I will bloom whether you like it or not.

I am changing.tumblr_mg80tesGgX1s28fnko1_500

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